Monday, March 9, 2009

Moved

Following many people's recommendation that wordpress is the place to be I have moved this blog to http://notamustread.wordpress.com . For those of you who have added me to their blogrolls I humbly request that you change the link on the same. For those who have not yet added me; now would be a very good time to do so. ( Please!)

See you there!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Just an update

When i first started this blog; I was very enthusiastic churning out posts at an amazing frequency. Since then the motivation to create new posts has somewhat diminished and to my surprise there have been no new posts for almost 2 weeks. There is probably a reason for this inexcusable lethargy. The last few weeks have seen a flurry of action in my life which has left me with very little time to update the blog
So here is just a brief summary of events in the last two weeks

SPACE : SPACE 09 promised to be bigger and better than ever before. (snigger). While the day-time events were better than last year the pronites really took boredom to a whole new level. Winning the last quiz of my last SPACE would probably be the most memorable moment of the whole festival. The one phenomenon that puzzles me is the lack of enthusiasm from the majority of people towards the festival. While a fraction of my class worked our asses off trying to spice up the festival, the rest were busy playing cricket in Bhavan's ground ( Incredible but true!). This years SPACE also saw the introduction of compulsory seating in the quad during a pronite in a scene remniscent of a school festival. Considering the organised chaos in the quad that was a hallmark of all festivals till date; continuing this tradition will result in the ultimate death of the pronite. ( which judging by the present standards may not be such a bad thing after all!)

Results : Being in final year has a distinct advantage. The days when the rumour of an impending display of the result which would stir the class like a hornet's nest have long gone. There is no pandemonium at the mere utterance of the word, rather a weary walk to the exam centre contemplating the same journey made in previous years. It was afternoon on the first day of SPACE when the results finally came out interrupting our ( rahter expensive) lunch at the food court. This year the gods had been merciful to us. Almost everyone in my group passed and I got a 78% ( which is quite surprising considering the amount of time I spent in GRE and admissions last semester). Anyhow alls well that ends well and thats one monkey off my back for now


The Admits : At last, at long last, two admits have arrived. One from the University of Texas at Arlington and the other from Austin. I apologise to all my friends for being excessively depressed during the dark days prior to this when nothing seemed to be working inspite of their assurances that everything would work out in the end. I am now finally in a position to give that damn seminar on GRE and the admission procedure with a clear conscience. My heart goes out to all those who will be forced by the IEEE committee to sit for it against their better judgement.


SPQC : SPQC is the only thing worth looking forward to every week although my active participation is being resented by a lot of people for winning all the previous quizzes. ( Seems everyone else also wants the honour of showing Chinmay the finger after winning!). So this time I have been requested to set the quiz along with Heston . Its my first time and setting a quiz is turning out to be fucking hard. I just hope I manage to set a half decent quiz and not end up killing SPQC once and for all.

Lectures. The lack of interest in football from my esteemed classmates has seen me sitting for far too many lectures than recommended by doctors to maintain mental health. For the first time in eight semester the defaulter's list does not have the honour of including my name. A sad reminder of how incredibly boring this semester has been.

Anyway thats it for now. Signing off hoping for more frequent updates ( Yes, I can hear the multitude praying for the exact opposite but turn a deaf ear to their protests!!)

Friday, February 20, 2009

A Few Childhood Memories

“Girls are like slugs. They serve some purpose but it's hard to imagine what.” Reading the above panel in Calvin and Hobbes took my mind back to my childhood when my sentiments closely echoed those of Calvin. Getting bored on a Saturday afternoon with nothing to look forward to for the next three days, I decided to make this long post about a few childhood memories.

1. The routine miracles : Calvin would have been proud of the fuss I made about going to school; until my mother had a idea that to me today classifies as pure genius. She convinced me that if i prayed real hard; I would get chocolates in my lunchbox and my water would get coverted to orange squash. It really did happen and these little miracles reconciled me to spending a quarter of my life-span gaining knowledge. It was only much later that I realised that God while perfectly capable of turning water to wine had entrusted the duty of converting water to orange squash to my mother. In fact she even hid behind the curtain to eavesdrop on my prayers to find out which chocolate was to appear miraculously in my lunch-box. What appears to us strange and wonderous in our childhood days always seems to have a perfectly logical explanation later in life

2. Wanderlust : A restless day in school saw me wander away from my class unnoticed. School was just across the road and going back home seemed like a great idea. How a 4 year old boy crossed the busiest street in Jaipur on his own without becoming road-kill is still unknown and may count as a miracle ( A real one this time!). After finally managing to pack me away to school my mom was just sitting down when she heard me singing outside the house. I knew the colony but didnt know which building my house was in and I was just roaming around singing " Tinkle Tinke Litti Tar" at the top of my voice. She rushed out and picked me up and the story had a happy ending except for my teacher who got a real-talking to for negligence of duty and was suspended from duty.

3. Cats : She had just given birth to 5 kittens and was protecting them much like a lioness protects her cubs. National Geographic was not around those days and I unwittingly picked up one of those kittens. A blur of motion is all i remember till her claws made contact with my face tearing away half my right cheek. I remember blood pouring down my clothes and tears streaming down while I howled like a dog that has just been stoned. I was rushed to hospital while she was thrown out of the house. Since then I have had a dislike for cats and I believe from their reactions the feeling is mutual.

4. Girls : To prevent me from crying my lungs out while being bundled to school; I was dragged at times to a neighbours house whose two girls went to the same school. Apparently I found it shameful to cry in front of girls and went to school without a fuss. Looking back I have fallen prey to the wily ways of girls even before I could comprehend their purpose on this earth!

5. Fireworks : It was two days before Dusshera and the older boys were stuffing crackers into the effigies of the demons for Ram Leela. I was standing by as a curious bystander and suddenly noticed a lighter that had been left lying around. As soon as I figured out how to operate it; I tried to set fire to the big heap of firecrackers lying around. Luckily it was snatched out of my hand before I blew us all to kingdom come. In fact his timely action is the only reason why I am still alive and writing this blog today ( Yeah i know what you are thinking; He should be publicly hanged for his foolishness!)

And with that I have posted enough for the time being. Of course I did not remember all the details and its only through painstaking research that I have managed to present my reader(s) with the accurate and unabridged version of these events!

Monday, February 16, 2009

Secrets to a Successful Blog

So here i was sitting contemplating on various random things like why did my accent suddenly turn psuedo- american while talking to staff from the admissions centre of universities and whether it was possible that someone had created a voodoo doll with my resemblance when another pertinent question struck my consciousness. I was checking my number of profile visits or people who read this blog ( I admire your courage!!) and found the number to be around 20. Considering that half of these were made by me to see if me clicking my profile increased the number of visits ( it does!) and whether people read my blog ( quite obviously not!) I am left with a clientile of maybe 3 or 4. Quite staggering figures those!!

Like any newbie blogger I had started this blog with the intention of catering to a wide audience, things were not quite working out the way i intended them to. So like I said at the beginning as a learning experience I decided to take a closer peek at some of the more well-read blogs and ascertain the reasons for their success . And then the reason for my abject failure struck me like a dumper truck at 100mph. I had been wrong from the very outset. Most of my posts were light-humoured sarcasmless takes on quite ordinary life events which I believed was what people looked for in a blog. But considering the posts in other blogs I have figured what really attracts the viewers must have one or more of the following characteristics.

1. The post mush show you to be a deeply disturbed individual struggling to find normalcy in a world where sanity is revered. So stuff like " Nothing makes sense. I'm headed forward with no fixed destination. "is lapped up by the discerning audience

2. The message in the post be profound. In fact the profundity should be of such an extent that the reader necessarily must not be able to make head or tail of it. In some cases even the blogger must lose track of what what is being said and trail off into a plethora of unrelated big ( may not be GRE but substituting a big word where a smaller word could have been easily used) words that may not convey any information but make the reader draw his breath at such a sumptous offering from the literary gods.

3. Poetry : Who does not like poems. So fill your blog with poems while not giving a damn for meter or rhyme of any of the silly, archaic laws of poetry ( who the hell even knows about laws of poetry?)

4. The most important rule : people love misery. Seeing other people stumble through life's obstacles is an elixir for most giving them an experience akin to nirvana. Obviously Buddha was quite off-the-mark when he said true love for all nature is the path to moksha and eternal bliss. All you need to be happy is see a fellow human-being suffer. And if you can make Anne Frank pale in comparison in your blog you have a wide readership almost instantaneously hooked to your blog messaging you to update it at all costs

5. Last but not the least express your deep anguish at any tragedies and wonder aloud when will things change, finish your blog and then get back to your normal life. Express your deep desire however to change the system in whatever way you can (obviously you cant!). The reading public loves to see rebels without a clue ( oops did i say clue i meant cause!!).

After preparing the list I sat down to see which of my posts confirmed to any one of the desired characteristics and sadly you the regular readers are already aware of the answer.

So here I am faced with a difficult decision : to stay true to the intent with which the blog was initially started or to change my style to accede to the demands of the reading public and transform myself into a media celebrity and gain instant popularity.

Keep watching this space with bated breath ( too much??) to find out What Happens Next!!

Friday, February 13, 2009

A Crazy Thursday

Thursday is the one day of the week I look forward to because of the SPQC. The tedium of the remaining days of college is mitigated in the one hour i spend doing one of my favorite activities : quizzing. But this one Thursday will stick out considering the events that were about to unfold throughout the course of the day.

It began like every other day in my life. I woke up cursing at 7 am and after 15 minutes of procrastination managed to drag my sleepy ass out of bed.

Considering that the assignment due for the day had not been written, it was an easy decision to stay out of trouble by conveniently bypassing the lecture for the canteen. While the rest of the class opted to play cricket, me and Rohit decided to try the old Bhavan's trick of " How many are you? Can we Play" on a group of f.e's playing football. To our dismay, the usual esteem given to B.E's was sorely lacking amongst this particular group and we were downright snubbed . To avoid humiliation in front of our classmates we took a roundabout way to the canteen to drown our sorrows in a pitcher of FLW. Turns out it was not going to be our only reject that day.

Soon it was time for the weekly edition of SPQC. Rohit and me had been regular quizzing partners for the last 3 years but we had nothing to show for it. Finishing 2nd or 3rd regularly had convinced us that this was to be like every other quiz. However Rohit was on fire this time around and our team managed to own the quiz. One of the many reasons to remember this day. Another being my black Pepe Jeans shirt had got the approval of the most hard-to-please fashion critics. ( If only good clothes were not so frigging expensive!)

Checking my inbox had been a pain for the last 3 months. Not only was there no communication from universities but it seemed all the spammers in the world had selected this particular time frame to bombard me with their useless mails. This time however my alacrity at winning the quiz was going to shatter in a matter of seconds.University of Minnesota, after months of consideration had found me unsuitable for their master's program. To quote them " We hope our decision will not affect your determination to pursue further education". ( Why should it? After all they have only found me lacking necessary qualifications to pursue further education in their university! How this could be dampen my enthusiasm to pursue the same is still beyond me!!).

Turns out even Rohit had been given the same royal treatment, in short fuckkk offff with a capital FUCK. ( The irony is that the origin of the word FUCK and the universally accepted middle finger gesture had been asked in the quiz and we had answered it correctly too in fact!)
With a heavy heart I retired to bed that night. Seems life can be very unpredictable, fleeting moments of happiness amongst a sea of troubles, much like sunshine peeping through overcast skies. Resolving to not let this affect my state of mind, I lay tossing and turning in bed before weariness took its toll and I fell into dreamless sleep.

( If you are reading this Parinita, no amount of coercion or physical harm is bound to make me submit this blog as " Extracts from a geek's diary " (i am not a geek inspite of what you think) for the essay writing competition on Tuesday!!)

Monday, February 9, 2009

dev.d: the inconsistencies

I have read over 10 reviews for the movie and asked friends about their opinion
Many say it sucks; its too long and that it gets repetitive in the second half
some cannot stop raving about it as a work of art, the Times of India gave it 5 out of 5 stars, something probably not seen since the Lord of the Rings!
I am frankly baffled by this; has our society been so polarised that what is manna for one section of the populace is a bitter pill for the other to be avoided at all costs? or is the movie made to cater to the tastes of a select clientele while the rest can go boil themselves? ( no profanities in my blog!! :P)

I have been trying to solve this conundrum for quite some time. I would like it if you could post comments regarding your opinion about the movie. As they say in a democracy the opinion of the majority counts and the results can be used to have a fair critique of the movie

Cheers!!

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Liverpool : Rotten Apples in the barrel





When Shakespeare wrote " Something is rotten in the state of Denmark" he captured perfectly the turmoil and conflict associated with a change in governance. The same phrase can be used to describe the situation with Liverpool today!
I started supporting this club a long time ago when the media dismissed the clubs as the has-beens of english football. A club with limited international exposure but still supported by a group of fiercely loyal fans. The supporter oriented approach of the club may not have brought in the marketing revenue but held together a closely knit bunch of people; fanatics as some may call them who lived and breathed football and Liverpool. I was hooked to this club; the under-dogs, financially unsound and still reeling under the impact of Mr Souness. It appealed to me in a way no other club did and I officialy started telling people I supported Liverpool.
Under the Houllier regime Liverpool progressed a bit at first coming second in the 200-2001 season and winning the FA cup; league and UEFA cup. There was talk of the glory days returning but after that the club went into a decline till Mr Benitez took charge after disagreements with the board at Valencia.
The success in 04-05 Champions league and 05-06 FA cup saw the club back into the media glare but along with it got a new breed of fans or plastics as we like to call them. The club management changed hands with the arrival of the two cowboys Hicks and Gillet who seem to have taken an early lead in the race for the most reviled football club owners of all time.
The new stadium plan was changed a zillion times and almost a year after construction was supposed to have started; the plot for Stanley Park remains untouched ( apart from a little nonsense work which was done to appease the baying fans); the best manager liverpool have had in the last twenty years was under criticism and the management resorted to washing dirty laundry in public ( something unheard of in the club's glorious industry).
The recent Robbie Keane episode ( feel sorry for the bugger) highlights the cracks in the hierarchy of the club. Rafa and Parry have both sought to distance themselves from the whole farce but at the end of it all the club finds itself a striker short at a time the title is still within its hands.
The last two years have been a trying time for the fans. The takeover by DIC is still stalled and the owners have backtracked on all promises made to the fans. Fan agitations are the flavour of the day outside Anfield and the training grounds at Melwood.
The situation has deteriorated so badly that i feel alienated from the club. What was more important than life or death as said by the great Mr Shankley now has become a passing distraction. I would not say that I am shifting to supporting another club but the level of passion has certainly reduced due to my disgust at the way the club has been run in recent times descending to a unfunny caricature of what it once stood for.Unless the club ownership gets its act together and starts delivering on the promises made and gets 100% behind the manager ( I firmly believe Rafa is the best thing that has happened to the club in the last 15 years) it risks alienating a significant proportion of the fan base. A truly sad moment in the history of the greatest club in England.